WHAT WOULD I EAT ON MY BIRTHDAY IF I COULD GO ANYWHERE AND EAT ANYTHING?

I was thinking about this yesterday while on my walk. What would be my ideal day of eating?

Restrictions I place on this concept are that the list has to be compiled from my actual dining experiences and also, cannot involve a restaurant that no longer exists. This means, the food trucks of LA are out for lunch and I cannot include either of my 2 favorite LaJolla area restaurants for dinner - each of which have long since gone away.

Also, we'll need to set the rules of physics, time and space aside -- such as the time it takes to travel between places, and the fact that if you eat well all day, you may not be hungry for dinner.

It is an interesting question and one that certainly makes for good thought during a 3 mile pre-breakfast walk. So to Sue, I say, save up your calories - you're coming along with me. Here is what I came up with.

First Course

Let's start the day slowly, with coffee and pastry. The pastry - a morning bun from Tartine in San Francisco. "I'll take that pastry to go", and then zip over to that little spot in Milan by the train station, where you drink your caffès (espressos) while standing and mingling with the local residents and shop owners.

Second Course

Next would be something a little more substantial -- and a return trip to the San Francisco for a smoked salmon sandwich from Capt'n Mikes Holy Smoke, at the Ferry Building farmer's market. The alder smoked salmon is served on crusty sourdough with cream cheese, heirloom tomatoes, capers and some red onion for crunch. To go with it, I'll grab some fresh squeezed orange juice, maybe a few local ripe plums and a cup of black french roast coffee.

Lunch

The lunch choice was probably my biggest challenge. I've had so many great lunches, and there are many choices, local to me in Philadelphia, that excel in their areas but don't impress me as ideal celebration spots. I mean, is there a better sandwich than a cheesesteak from Chink's or Tony Lukes? A more satisfying meal than the no. 12 Pho from Pho 75? How about the pork sandwich with sharp provalone and broccoli rabe from Denics? But these are somehow, not special enough.

I've had great, more sophisticated lunches from XIX, Tinto, LeBec Fin. But sophistication doesn't seem the right ingredient for the day. I'm thinking more like the former group, but also more spontaneous, more current - more like street food, but not too local. Unfortunately, since my rule was, that I had to have experienced it, that leaves out all of Southeast Asia, much of Mexico & South America - all of which seem to be ideal. It also leaves out the Border Grill lunch truck, one that has that foreign flare and is on my list of things to target in the near future.

...so my choice then, is not so much a compromise, but a third approach: I think it is going to be Texas BBQ - from the City Market, in Luling, TX. Some brisket, some ribs, a sausage. I can smell the smoke!

White bread, raw onion, pickled jalapeno on the side and a local soda to wash it down.

A piece of pie - pecan, banana cream, coconut - with a scoop of Blue Bell ice cream and a glass of milk for dessert. And if they run out of pie at the City Market (something that happens every day), I know a place near Abilene.

Late Afternoon Snack

Easy one. Paris. A small city park with adequate foot traffic for people watching. A warm, sunny October afternoon. A bottle (or 2) of Burgundy, a baguette from the nearby boulangerie, several cheeses.

Afterwards, a quick jaunt over to Chestnut Hill Coffee for a macchiato. And then a nap.

Dinner

The second toughest choice is dinner, for similar reasons as lunch - too many good options to choose from and too many different approaches, too many places I want to try but haven't yet. I was almost going to choose The kitchen table menu at Charlie Trotters, in Chicago, because it is an incredible meal, but I think I prefer something with a younger feel, with higher energy, a lively bar area for drinks and appetizers, a place with fresh ingredients and grilled meats.

So, it is back to the West coast, to Santa Monica for the Border Grill (yeah, the lunch truck people - and now you know why it's on my lunch list). I think I will make a dinner out of an extended happy hour.

And with the 8 hour difference between Paris and LA, I just might be hungry and sober again.

And after all of this, I think I will be satisfied (that is of course, unless they have a slice of coconut lime pie on the menu).

WHEN ON THE ROAD, ITS ALL ABOUT THE FOOD

It's not really, but it is. In so many ways, food is how we relate to each other, how we experience local life, the reason/excuse/facilitation (your choice) for interacting with others, for learning. For satisfying our needs, our desires. Food is a source of pleasure, pain, disappointment, amazement.

Is there anything else that we look forward to constantly - at any age?

And so, here is the list of restaurants from my trip to COLORADO and CALIFORNIA (in order of appearance), along with a few impressions...

Au Bon Pain (PHL) - it's almost a tradition to grab a pecan roll before the flight

Peet's Coffee (PHL) - weak coffee of dubious quality and taste. At least it was less acidic than some but still, I threw most of it out.

Suki Thai (Boulder) - reasonable bowl of pho-like soup intended to fix the damage of the plane ride and fortify me for what was to come. Later in the week, I found their chicken pad thai tasty in spite of the way it was made. It went very well with Wild Turkey 101 10 yr.

Lee Yuan Chinese Cuisine (Boulder) - TOO MUCH mayonnaise and TOO LITTLE (as in none) Grand Marnier in the eponymous shrimp & walnut dish. Also, how fresh were those walnuts? None the less, Bob's asian noodles were pretty good. 

Carelli's (Boulder) - Three people ordered fish and chips (sweet potato fries, no less). Although F&C would be nice, NOT FROM AN ITALIAN RESTAURANT. Fighting the majority, I ordered veal parm. All to go because Bob was feeling too weak.

Black Pepper Pho (Boulder) - my first banh mi - it was good if not dummied down. The roll was perfect.

Big Daddy's Bagels (Boulder) - egg bagel and free wifi. All-day heartburn was not on the menu but came at no extra charge.

El Indio (San Diego) - overrated and overpriced and now inhabited by so many tourists. Still, when I popped out of the rental car lot and noticed I was on India st., I had to grab a couple tasteless tacos before driving to the hotel.

CPK (LaJolla) - to me, the original CPK. Always crowded and walkable from the hotel.

Girard Gourmet (LaJolla) - the best little local nothing fancy place in LaJolla. Went for the cinnamon rolls and wound up eating breakfast. Enjoyed talking to Bridgett and the owner. I helped them understand what SCRAPPLE is.

Santana's (Yucca Valley) - In california, the burrito is the proper animal... no rice, no BS. Just meat or meat and beans - long stewed and flavorful meat. And a few options: guacamole, pico de gallo. Pour the salsa on as you eat it. The carnitas burrito was a tasty work of art, at least a pound and a half, and accompanied by 4 salsas, fresh made chips, beers - it took me until 12:30am to finish it. But the Phillies won, so it was all a lot of fun.

Sam's Pizza (Joshua Tree) - Anyone going here for the pizza just doesn't know better. Come here for the INDIAN food (asian, not western US - but you already knew that). Excellent !

Pappy and Harriet's (Pioneertown) - a honky tonk kind of place with live music only a few miles form the Yucca Valley. You can read the mixed reviews created from very subjective experiences that people get from the place. I don't know why you'd eat here, although it has a nice wood smoke smell when you enter. To me, what I found is what I expect from a place like this - lots of stuff on the walls and ceilings, character, dark, age, mid 30ish blonds in blue jeans behind the bar, somewhat insulated, but pleasant enough if you try to be cool and act local. Others at the bar, some wrapped up with their crowd, others easy to talk with. Overall, a hugely positive experience for me, especially when I was asked if my band was local ...but something not to be guaranteed at other visits.

JT Country Kitchen (Joshua Tree) - I feel like I discovered this place 20 years ago. Simple, small and good. The kind of place you can walk in and tell the waitress you want what he has (pointing to another table), and be told by the other diner what good taste you have. Don't miss the fresh made salsa for your huevos rancheros.

Japengo (LaJolla) - expensive place across the plaza and connected with the Hyatt in LaJolla that attracts many of the wrong kind of people - sales & marketing nitwits on expense accounts that order Miller Lite. The secret is happy hour - with a good selection of $3 pints (Fat Tire, Sierra, Guinness, Stone IPA and locals like Karl Strauss, etc.). AND FANTASTIC sushi... like the $5 Hawaiian roll: a California roll (west coast style, with real crab in a salad style), topped with spicy tuna, the mandatory toasted sesames, and a little ponzu sauce. Eat & Drink for 2 hours for under $30.

Barry's Pizza (HOU) - I'm in HOUSTON, so how come I CAN'T FIND ANY BBQ AT THE AIRPORT? As Eddie Pry would say, cheeze-o-wizz !!! I have to have a slice of pizza ???  a $5 slice of pizza, no less ???

ANATOMY OF A TWO POINT FIVE HOUR WAIT AT THE AIRPORT

I planned to be here at SAN, at 8:30, not 7:08.

It all starts with an early WAKE UP. Plan: 6:00am. Actual: 4:56am. I was showered, dressed and had moved my car moved from a parking spot up the street to a spot directly in front of the Hyatt by the time my iHOME alarm and my CELL phone alarms went off at 6:00.

PS - overnight self parking at the hyatt - $24. Parking on the street - free.

Planned HOTEL DEPARTURE TIME: 7:30am (7:15am for additional allowance). But I'm up and the news on TV is recyling. Sportscenter is out of the question because the Phillies lost yesterday. Let's go... actual departure from the hotel: 6:45. This included 2 attempts by the checkout guy to print a room receipt... still not showing a zero balance. I give up. What will the accounting department say?

I gassed the rental car up last night, so no station stop. San Diego airport is a straight shoot down I-5 from the Hyatt. Still, allowing for rush hour traffic and the expectant rains, I planned for a 30 minute ride to the Enterprise rental car drop off by the Washington street exit - one I've never been to before, I felt the 30 minute allowance was the right number.

Actual time to drive from the Hyatt, complete the drop off, including a brief survey of my satisfaction, be on the shuttle bus and heading toward the airport: 13 minutes.

The rest follows suit. Planned time to shuttle to the airport and CHECK-IN with Southwest: 30 minutes. It took 10 minutes.

So here I am at 7:17am, sitting at Starbucks with a double espresso, typing this. Two and a half hours before my 9:45 flight.

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EPILOG: Obviously, it is a different world now and we plan out our airport trips to allow for the security and other delays. But back in the mid 80s, it was different - and I still look back in disbelief at one incident and that I am a legend for.

I had a 7:00am business flight out of Philly. I left my house a little before 6:00 (I am about 30 minutes from the airport not counting parking). I will say I did not do this on purpose. Making matters worse, traffic was not cooperating and I started taking alternate routes, somehow winding up at Broad and Pattison avenues, in south Philly. If you are from Philly you know where this puts me... not too close to the airport. It was 6:25am.

Ignoring the posted speed limits and a few red lights, I somehow got to the airport and by 6:50, I was in full gallop, running through the terminals to the gate - where they were getting ready to close the door. It was a sweaty few minutes in my seat, but I made the flight.

This is one of the reasons, I allow myself plenty of time these days.

Final note: The mid 80s was also a time before OJ Simpson did the "if the glove don't fit, you must acquit" court scene and was pimping for Hertz. He had a famous commercial where he ran through the airport, conveniently dropping off his car and catching his flight on time. Everyone referred to this as my OJ Simpson moment.